Good news: I’ve found an item that is, in all likelihood, The Dress.
It is the San Patrick “Provenza” model, in a color inaccurately described as “off white” which actually meets my standard for “National Cathedral-grade nonshowy pale gold.” The floor sample is strapless with a sweep train, neither of these features to my taste; but with a little bit of tapering in the skirt to fit through the hips and visually lengthen the train, and the quickie addition of a pair of spaghetti straps, this dress is damn close to the one in my imagination.
(Caveat: imagine me ten pounds lighter in it. My post-holidays body, depicted here, will be nowhere to be found come October, I promise.)
Bad news: the floor sample alone — before alterations, no special order required — costs roughly &’s monthly mortgage payment on the Growlery. Add in the price quote for alterations and, oops, there goes my resolution not to spend mad pimp money on an item I plan to wear exactly once.
But maybe it’s worth it…